WHY HAMMER STRATEGIES?

WHY HAMMER STRATEGIES?

In a world full of Nails, sometimes you need a Hammer…

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Every case, every issue, every client, and every attorney are different, and one size definitely does not fit all. The ability to create and maintain trust between spouses, parents and other parties is vital. The relationship between opposing counsel is no less mission critical than the substance of what those attorneys “do” in Court, across the conference room table, or via Zoom. And the relationship between the attorneys, individually and jointly, and the Judge, mediator or arbitrator is no less critical.

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After over 15 years in the courtrooms of Cook, DuPage and Lake counties, I developed a reputation as a zealous, skilled litigator and advocate. I also managed to earn the respect and trust of the Judges in front of whom I appeared, as well as my opposing counsel. During that time, I came to believe that what often drove needless conflict in litigation and avoidable stalemate in mediation were less the substantive disputed issues between the parties and more a failure (in whole or in part) of the processes involved and the approaches taken within each of them. Those failures were not merely individual, but systemic to the established processes. In developing my own approach to both litigation and ADR, I thoughtfully and deliberately fashioned an outline for a process that would avoid, or at least mitigate, many of those pitfalls while maintaining flexibility for tackling the unique issues and personalities of each case. I also was mindful of designing flexible but definite strategies on the front-end to meet the many criticisms that I often heard (and sometimes shared) of the litigation and ADR processes.

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In medicine, the term “iatrogenic” refers to the circumstance when a medical treatment or procedure used to address a disease produces its own illness or disease. In divorce and custody cases, the legal equivalent of the iatrogenic effect abounds. It is the obligation, in my view, of attorneys, Judges and ADR neutrals to operate pursuant to a variation on the doctor’s Hippocratic oath to “first, do no harm.” Divorce and family law conflicts are already and always charged with deep-seated emotional issues. They are inevitably messy and invariably complicated. Harm in domestic relations matters can take many forms and can show itself in many ways, explicitly and implicitly. Very few people exit the family law process (in either mediation or litigation) feeling good about it. Often times they feel resentment, betrayal, and a sense of not being heard, understood or appreciated. Other times they regret the cost, the time expended, and the impact upon themselves, their children, and the relationship with the person they once loved (and often still love on some level).

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Ultimately, I wish for every client the thing that I found for myself, in my own amicable divorce from a fellow divorce lawyer almost a decade ago: a sensible, sane and sober process that permits for full expression of feelings, thoughts and ideas; and, a process that creates mutual satisfaction and shared advantage where possible. My personal and professional experiences have led me to a point where I can galvanize and utilize the best of my litigation, negotiation and communication experience over the last 15+ years as a lawyer and the best of my interpersonal abilities as a collaborative and cooperative divorced coparent of almost 10 years.